I saw this as a good opportunity to write a post on the differences between courtesans and escorts.  While they are part of the same field, they are not the same.  You could liken this to a surgeon not being the same as an obstetrician.  They are both doctors, but they specialise in different aspects of their field.

Let me start by saying that one is not better than the other.  The two are different and it really just comes down to “Different strokes for different folks”.

Fundamental Differences
An escort will often greet a client with a kiss, and some minor chit chat will ensue.  Normally, it won’t be much and they will get right down to business.  This chat may even occur while the client undresses, sets down his donation, and moves to the bed.  There will be some superficial connection, but what it comes down to is a the client being happy with what he sees.  Usually not much on the personal level.  An escort will focus on physically pleasuring the client ot his hearts content.

Afterward, there will usually be a bit more conversation leading up to either another shot or the end of the session.  Some do not stay the remainder of the duration.  The average booking is between 30 minutes and 2 hours.

Escorts are perfect for clients who:

• Is looking for a quickie
• Is looking for the fantasy situation of showing up, fucking, and leaving
• Want absolute “no strings attached” sex where emotions do not come into play at all
• Are hobbyists

Courtesans, on the other hand, tend to focus on the mind first and body later.  A courtesan may have wine, sparkling water, or even a fruit tray available to share at the beginning of the appointment.  Often the first portion of the appointment is spent talking – usually about his life (without going into TOO much detail of course), her past/background/education, current events, politics, or anything else that may come up.  Courtesans more often than not hold a degree, or are in the end stages working on one.¹  Many clients who hire courtesans will talk to them about their life and problems, hoping for the point of view of an uninvolved party.  Or even just an ear to listen, or shoulder to cry on.

When the courtesan feels a good connection has formed, she will progress the visit into the bedroom.  Afterwards, there’s usually a continuation of an earlier conversation and perhaps more activities if the mood is right.  Courtesans focus on both mental and physical stimulation under the belief that a psychological release can lead to a better physical one.  Also they feel the more comfortable the client is, the more open he can be behind closed doors enabling him to act out all of his deepest fantasies.

Courtesans are perfect for clients who:

• Desire a connection before intercourse
• Want to spend a longer period of time with the courtesan
• Need someone to talk to, whether on a casual level or deeper one
• Also subscribe to the belief that an emotional release first makes the physical release better

Price and Time Differences
While many escorts will offer half hour bookings, the average courtesan starts around 1 or 2 hours.

The reason for this isn’t because the courtesan wants more money, or is greedy – but because you cannot make the desired connection in 30 minutes AND allow time for the physical release.  You would use up the vast majority of the time (if not all of it) outside of the bedroom making the connection.

This does mean if you wish to see a courtesan, you will need more time and money.  There is an upside to this though.  Most escorts will allow you to book 30 min-4 hours, however the rates will simply be the 1 hour rate multiplied by the amount of hours, with the exception of 30 minutes (which usually is 2/3 the 1 hour rate).  Courtesans will often offer multi-hour discount.  I’ll use my own rates as an example.

My rate table when I was an escort:
$200/30 minutes
$250/1 hour
$375/1.5 hours
$500/2 hours
$750/3 hours
$1000/4 hours

My rate table as a courtesan:
$300/45 minutes (available for regulars only)
$350/1 hour
$500/1.5 hours
$650/2 hours
$900/3 hours
$1200/4 hours

As a courtesan, clients who book longer sessions are more often than not looking for the companionship aspect which is something I am more than happy to provide for hours at a time with a bit of fun mixed in.  With escorting, it’s a lot more physically demanding which is why I did not offer the same discounts.

I can see why the client who wrote that review was bothered.  Unfortunately the true differences between what escorts and courtesans are really aren’t that well known.  Most people probably just think “courtesan” is a good way to slap a higher price tag on the same product.  Unfortunately, as this client found out, that is not the case at all.  I say “unfortunately” because the client ended up unsatisfied, which is something that both escorts and courtesans would see as unfortunate.

In the end we’re all in the business of pleasure and satisfaction, and we’re all disappointed in ourselves when we don’t give it.

1. This does not mean escorts do not or cannot have degrees.  Many do!  And many are brilliant women.  What I’m simply saying is that a solid education is a requirement of being a courtesan due to the clientele you draw

Alexa states: The average client for most escorts (in the US) is a white male, in his mid-40s, and rather vanilla in his preferences.

I would agree with this. The average client is white, middle aged, and just looking for “normal” things like oral sex and multiple positions. Maybe anal if he’s feeling adventurous.

My average client age is all over the place. I cater to quite a few gentleman over 60. About 1/2 of them are widows or their wives are no longer physically able to be with them. Many of these men are just looking for companionship, cuddling, and just playing around. Though I will say this, there are some older clients that put guys my age¹ to absolute shame.

My youngest client was 23. He was new in town, worked 12-16 hours a day, and didn’t want to deal with the BS of dating. He figured paid companionship was the way to go.

I’d say if I had to put it in order, my average clients are usually 50-60, 40-50, 20-30, and 30-40.

I enjoy men from all walks, including hobbyists². I like impressing them quite a bit, and I have found them (for the most part) to be quite good. I do not have a review policy³ so hobbyists are fine by me. A lot of providers really don’t like them, and I can absolutely see why. Many of them think that providers are not equal to people, and they certainly don’t see them as in the customer service industry. They think they can barter, haggle, and publicly complain about prices. If you can screen out that type, hobbyists can be REALLY fun.

In terms of race, the majority of my clients are white. I have many Asian clients, and when in Canada a sprinkling of East Indians. I have had one black client, but no Hispanics as of yet. Most of my clients are from the US, Canada, or Ireland. I’m not sure why Ireland, but I’m guessing it has to do with me being a redhead.

In terms of profession I see a lot of “businessmen” (Owners, CEOs, and VPs mostly). I also see a decent amount of “professionals” (doctors, lawyers). And for whatever reason, I draw a lot of interest from men that work in IT. Namely programmers and game designers. I think this has to do with me enjoying Linux.

Unlike most, I do not focus on building a steady supply of regulars. I do have a fair amount of repeat business, but I’d say it only makes up about 1/3 of my business. The main reason for this is that the vast majority of my clients are only passing through the area either for some sort of music festival/concert/event or on business. I think that is mostly due to my location. When I was in Vancouver, I did have a steady supply of regulars.

My clients are, for the most part, married. Many openly wear their ring, but never talk about their marriages. Some don’t have rings, but talk about their wives and children openly. I do have a fair amount of single clients too, mostly my under 30 crowd. As I mentioned earlier, I also see a fair amount of widowers.

I’d say about half my clients are “vanilla”. The other half fall into two groups: Those who want backdoor play, and those who want to do Greek on me. I’ve noticed a much larger group of people who enjoy things like prostate massage down here in the Bible Belt where it’s more taboo to ask your partner for such things. I’m not sure location has anything to do with it, but if it did I certainly wouldn’t be surprised.

I have never had a client ask for BBFS, and would ask them to leave if they did. I’ve done CBJ and BBBJ. I make sure to get tested quite often completely with a throat swab.

So why is my client pool different than say, Rebecca’s, Alexa’s, or Rachael’s??

The difference in visit lengths is part of it. Alexa prefers 2 hours, Rebecca prefers overnights. I’m a big fan of the gentleman’s hour⁴ and 3-4 hour visits. Much like every lady has a time preference, so does every client.

How and where I advertise is an attributing factor too. I have a banner running on TBD⁵, a weekly ad on TER⁶, SouthernGFE, and OAD⁷. Why so many places? Well, when I am in Canada I advertise on EROS, PERB⁸, and CERF⁹. I get a lot of my business in Canada via word of mouth and referrals. Down here in Nashville I don’t have the luxury of referrals as I’m new to the area. So advertising is the way to go until I build a solid reputation¹⁰.

Alexa made a wonderful point in her post. She mentioned that aside from a few small details, her clients aren’t much different than the clients of other women in the high end of the industry. I would have to agree. I would imagine that most women in my price point have the same types of clientele. The exception is my “non-vanilla” clients. Most of them admit they do not ask other providers for these things, but that my reviews + how open minded I seem in person lead them to ask me. I guess there’s just something about redheads, eh?

1. 25
2. also known as pooners, punters
3. other than “please link it to me”
4. 90 minutes
5. a national review board
6. another national review board
7. OpenAdultDirectory
8. local review board
9. another local board
10. I’m actually doing quite well on that and am very happy

They are all filthy rich
Generally when you see men in the media who’ve been caught with escorts, they are well off. While many of the clients I see are in “white collar jobs”¹, there’s also a good number of “blue collar workers”² that see me as well. The ONLY difference is that one group saves up to see me, and the other group is fortunate enough to have more disposable income.

Can a man with more disposable income occasionally indulge more? Yes. But this is actually pretty rare. All of my clients, regardless of financial status, see me around the same amount.

They are “creepy old men”
My client base ranges from 20 to 75. Most clients are between 30-55, with the average client being around 43-47. Hardly “creepy old men”, at least in my opinion. I have seen several older clients (65+), and really enjoy my time with them. I’ve not had a single client that fits the “creepy old man” stereotype. I’m sure there are “creepy old men” who see escorts, and I may even encounter one, but are they the norm? Hardly.

There must be something wrong for them to pay for sex
Is there something wrong with you because you pay someone to colour your hair? Is there something wrong with you because you get Roto-Rooter to fix your toilet instead of DIY? I don’t think so. I am of the mindset that if you want something done right, you’re better off hiring a professional than taking a gamble with an amateur.

When it comes down to it, hiring an escort is cheaper than going barhopping. Not only is it cheaper, it’s as close to a guarantee as you’re going to get. Not to mention the girl is likely to be more sober than one you pick up in a bar.

When selecting an escort, you can choose someone who fits your aesthetic preferences. You can read reviews and get a preview of whether or not you’ll be getting the most bang for your buck³. There’s also the advantage of the drama-free encounter, not having to call someone the next morning, and a true no strings attached encounter.

In short, hiring a professional is not done because there’s something wrong with the client. The average client merely wants a professional experience with no drama.

They are sleazy womanisers, and/or misogynists
Quite the opposite actually. The average client enjoys the female body almost to the point of worship. I have found my clients to be the biggest sweethearts in the world. Generally those who hate women do not pay them hundreds of dollars for their company.

They are sexually inept
No more than the average man. I’ve had clients that were amazing lovers, clients that were poor lovers, and clients that wanted to have lessons in becoming better lovers.

What I have found is that my clients are more into the idea of pleasing me first and them second. Moreso than the average man. If anything, I’d say that fact alone makes them a better lover whether or not their sexual skills are top notch.

They are socially inept
Also not true. I’ve had shy, awkward clients but again – no more than in everyday life. The majority of my clients are very talkative and outgoing. It’s not that they can’t get a woman, or are too awkward around them. Most just don’t want the drama of unpaid companionship.

1. I really hate the labels white and blue collar
2. I really hate the labels white and blue collar
3. pun intended

The book was a huge disappointment and actually really pissed me off. As one of the reviews say, all it did was reinforce the stereotype that sex workers are shopoholic drug addicts. And as we all know, that’s not true. But from what you read in this book it just seems like anyone worth a damn in the industry is living this lifestyle full of careless spending and drug binges. They act like it’s just standard to be a coke addict. Well it’s NOT. Yes, a lot of street workers are addicts…but most streetworkers were addicts who went into working to fund their habit. I’m talking about women who go into sex work voluntarily without an addiction fueling the decision.

Natalia, for example, made well over $10,000 a week. She was a Canadian immigrant to the US. She had no health insurance, no savings, she spent all of the money on clothes and drugs. Literally. And that annoys me, because THESE are the stories you hear about escorts – and strippers as well.

You don’t hear about the ones that fund their masters or even doctorate degrees with the money, or the ones who save wisely and end up with a paid off house and car before age 30. You never hear about the ones that are happy being escorts and do it long term, or the ones who are successful at it. You hear about the ones that have some kind of tragic failure or succumb to addiction or depression. Why? Because if we talked about the people who are HAPPY with sex work, who are in it voluntarily then it would become less taboo. The people against sex work don’t want to hear it. They don’t want to believe, or even face the fact that there are some people who are not mentally ill, who don’t have daddy issues, who aren’t on drugs that actually ENJOY sex work. They especially don’t want to admit that these women could have healthy relationships outside of work, raise normal children. That these women could be their friend or neighbour.

So instead, all we hear about are people like Ashley Dupré and Natalia. Now yes, we have the lovely Veronica Monet however I guarantee the average person would know Ashley over Veornica because of Eliot Spitzer. And that’s only public interest because it highlights the evils of prostitution. Shows the drama and shame.

And that folks, is not the real truth. That is not how the average sex worker lives. It’s not a non-stop-sex-party-coke-up-the-nose-until-my-septum-vanishes-designer-clothes-shopping-binge. Most of us lead absolutely normal lives with normal problems. Most of us aren’t nymphos. I enjoy sex with my significant other. I like my job, but it has nothing to do with the amount of sex I have.

But it got me to thinking, what would I do if I made Natalia’s rate ($2,000 per hour, 2 hour minimum – 50% house cut) working her hours (10-12 per day, 7 days per week). I couldn’t even imagine it. My mind was a giant blank. I couldn’t fathom what I would do with that money. So I just toned it down to if I made $5,000 a day (which is actually possible with my current rate) working 5 days per week. And this is what I came up with for $100,000 per month.

-Take care of my mothers rent and bills ($2,500 per month).
-Put $75,000/month in a high interest savings account.
-Pay my own bills ($3,500 – I’d get a nicer apartment with that kind of money, rent would be about $1,900)
-Buy a few very nice dresses/outfits for outcalls ($2,000-$3,500 one time cost)
-Maintain my work supplies ($35/month – new stockings, makeup, baby wipes, condoms, lube, etc)
-Tuition ($11,000/year)
-Pay my taxes

That’s all I can think of that’s really worth my money. I guess that makes me boring. But honestly, I’m just being realistic. Escorting will not last until I retire unless I’m very fortunate and age gracefully while taking amazing care of myself. Sex work is a time sensitive business for the average woman. I am not saying you have to look 20 your entire life, but you cannot fall apart either. The realism is that you will more than likely never make this kind of money again That is, unless you’re a doctor, lawyer, or something along those lines. So why NOT save?

I don’t know, I can see the temptations of ‘the easy life’ living in a harem like apartment for most people, getting high and drunk all the time, having a lot of sex and best of all getting paid for it. But I still can’t fathom how you could go through all of that shit and not save a dime. I am practical to a fault.

And worse yet, writing a book where you make your experience seem like the norm KNOWING it’s hurting other people in your former line of work, knowing that you’re the exception not the rule. Natalia’s book, especially the ending, makes her sound like she’s on a high horse now that she’s not an escort. She makes excuses of how she ’stumbled’ into it, her woe is me story, and how she has a ‘legit’ job now. It’s as if she does not see the profession as valid at all and just used it as a means to party

It’s disappointing, to say the least.