Cortigiana Onesta

I recently was gifted with this book which is supposed to be about the rise and fall of Natalia, an escort that once commanded $2,000 an hour but due to drugs and a shopping addiction she fell from grace.

The book was a huge disappointment and actually really pissed me off. As one of the reviews say, all it did was reinforce the stereotype that sex workers are shopoholic drug addicts. And as we all know, that’s not true. But from what you read in this book it just seems like anyone worth a damn in the industry is living this lifestyle full of careless spending and drug binges. They act like it’s just standard to be a coke addict. Well it’s NOT. Yes, a lot of street workers are addicts…but most streetworkers were addicts who went into working to fund their habit. I’m talking about women who go into sex work voluntarily without an addiction fueling the decision.

Natalia, for example, made well over $10,000 a week. She was a Canadian immigrant to the US. She had no health insurance, no savings, she spent all of the money on clothes and drugs. Literally. And that annoys me, because THESE are the stories you hear about escorts – and strippers as well.

You don’t hear about the ones that fund their masters or even doctorate degrees with the money, or the ones who save wisely and end up with a paid off house and car before age 30. You never hear about the ones that are happy being escorts and do it long term, or the ones who are successful at it. You hear about the ones that have some kind of tragic failure or succumb to addiction or depression. Why? Because if we talked about the people who are HAPPY with sex work, who are in it voluntarily then it would become less taboo. The people against sex work don’t want to hear it. They don’t want to believe, or even face the fact that there are some people who are not mentally ill, who don’t have daddy issues, who aren’t on drugs that actually ENJOY sex work. They especially don’t want to admit that these women could have healthy relationships outside of work, raise normal children. That these women could be their friend or neighbour.

So instead, all we hear about are people like Ashley Dupré and Natalia. Now yes, we have the lovely Veronica Monet however I guarantee the average person would know Ashley over Veornica because of Eliot Spitzer. And that’s only public interest because it highlights the evils of prostitution. Shows the drama and shame.

And that folks, is not the real truth. That is not how the average sex worker lives. It’s not a non-stop-sex-party-coke-up-the-nose-until-my-septum-vanishes-designer-clothes-shopping-binge. Most of us lead absolutely normal lives with normal problems. Most of us aren’t nymphos. I enjoy sex with my significant other. I like my job, but it has nothing to do with the amount of sex I have.

But it got me to thinking, what would I do if I made Natalia’s rate ($2,000 per hour, 2 hour minimum – 50% house cut) working her hours (10-12 per day, 7 days per week). I couldn’t even imagine it. My mind was a giant blank. I couldn’t fathom what I would do with that money. So I just toned it down to if I made $5,000 a day (which is actually possible with my current rate) working 5 days per week. And this is what I came up with for $100,000 per month.

-Take care of my mothers rent and bills ($2,500 per month).
-Put $75,000/month in a high interest savings account.
-Pay my own bills ($3,500 – I’d get a nicer apartment with that kind of money, rent would be about $1,900)
-Buy a few very nice dresses/outfits for outcalls ($2,000-$3,500 one time cost)
-Maintain my work supplies ($35/month – new stockings, makeup, baby wipes, condoms, lube, etc)
-Tuition ($11,000/year)
-Pay my taxes

That’s all I can think of that’s really worth my money. I guess that makes me boring. But honestly, I’m just being realistic. Escorting will not last until I retire unless I’m very fortunate and age gracefully while taking amazing care of myself. Sex work is a time sensitive business for the average woman. I am not saying you have to look 20 your entire life, but you cannot fall apart either. The realism is that you will more than likely never make this kind of money again That is, unless you’re a doctor, lawyer, or something along those lines. So why NOT save?

I don’t know, I can see the temptations of ‘the easy life’ living in a harem like apartment for most people, getting high and drunk all the time, having a lot of sex and best of all getting paid for it. But I still can’t fathom how you could go through all of that shit and not save a dime. I am practical to a fault.

And worse yet, writing a book where you make your experience seem like the norm KNOWING it’s hurting other people in your former line of work, knowing that you’re the exception not the rule. Natalia’s book, especially the ending, makes her sound like she’s on a high horse now that she’s not an escort. She makes excuses of how she ’stumbled’ into it, her woe is me story, and how she has a ‘legit’ job now. It’s as if she does not see the profession as valid at all and just used it as a means to party

It’s disappointing, to say the least.